Ever hear “You’re your own worst enemy?” It’s because you can’t exactly delete your mind’s contact information if it treats you badly, and most people give that “little voice” in the back of their head more credit than it deserves.
You see, those tricks your mind plays on you has a name: the BIG, FAT and LIMITING lies we tell ourselves. So I’ve gathered 8 of the most common lies we tell ourselves, and some advice on how to overcome those.
1. I have to find my true passion.
On the surface the “finding your passion” seems to work… in reality it’s not much that a secondary piece of advice by self-proclaimed gurus and B-level speakers. Assuming that there this only one true magical passion for each of us, well is just not true. A passion is something you enjoy and are interested in. Passions are what you want to BE, not what you want to DO.
2. I’m happy with what I have now
Though gratitude and positive thinking are both important for your career and wellbeing, this is just the “comfort zone” fear speaking out of your throat. Staying where you are for good equates moving backwards. Sure, it might be scary, overwhelming and intimidating at first – but here’s the thing: your comfort zone is like a muscle. You can work out, follow a regime, and – BOOM – it gets bigger, allowing you to try and dare more things.
3. It’s not going to work
The fear of losing is really a nifty one, because, let’s face it, there are a lot more people willing to detail what could go wrong rather than what could go right.
Oprah Winfrey was told she “wasn’t fit for television” and was fired from her position as a TV reporter; now she’s one of the most recognizable TV personalities in the entire world. It’s important to manage these “losses” and look at the bigger picture; just because they said it, doesn’t mean it’s true.
4. Money is the source of all evil.
Money generally gets a bad rap. It's something most people want, but it often ends up criticized as an evil entity out there to encourage people to do absolutely anything to get it. Well here’s the newsflash: Money doesn’t matter. It’s a mere representative of goods and services that actually bring you enjoyment, not the paper itself. It is a mean for the things that we desire and that make us feel good (and those vary a lot between different people.
5. Better safe than sorry.
The stability tale that we grew up with is a thing of the past: go to school, find a job and retire after 40 years of a successful career. Well here’s the thing: it just doesn’t work! Yes it was the desired lifestyle in the 60s, 70s and 80s… but in today hyper- connect, technology oriented and fast evolving market – well it’s just not going to fly.
6. You can make a job out of any passion.
Sure like something and enjoying your time doing it is a great start, but I’m afraid it’s not going to cut. There is a difference In between being a spectacular shower-singer and actually making in the music industry. If you’re looking to turn your passion into a job, then it does need to be marketable. The key to deciding which passion can actually be a career is by asking yourself two simple question – are you good at it?
7. I’m such a fraud.
Many high-achieving people – and, statistically, most high-achieving women – find it difficult, if not impossible, to internalize their accomplishments. Even when external evidence proves their competence, they can’t take mental credit or even recognize the magnitude of their achievements – yep I’m talking about the Imposter Syndrome. It’s not humble to think less of your accomplishments – it’s self-depreciation, and it holds you back from pursuing your goals with passion.
8. I’m not ready yet.
We all have it…a list of things we need to do…to read…to prepare…to finish before we start something else. Blogs. Magazines. Books. Courses. Assignments. Travels. Networks. Yes you name it, there’s always going to be something “needing to be done” before we feel that we “graduated” to the next step. The only problem is: well it’s never going to come, unless you commit to actually taking action and making in work.
So now you have them – the 8 big myths we feed ourselves and prevent us from an even more successful career. Don’t settle on your dreams, lose those fears and make it work!
Written by Rita Golstein-Galperin